I've Moved!

Well, I have big news! My website is now up and running. I'm so excited to have this project completed and will now only post on my website blog: http://www.heatherboersma.com/blog/

Please come visit me at www.heatherboersma.com

Red Rock Wrap Up

I had planned to end with two more video blogs about camp, but things got a little thrown off by the smashing and possible breaking of a big toe!  Said big toe is presently healing and going through a sunset of colours in the process...blue, purple, green, yellow and now almost back to normal.

Here is the final wrap up of my time at Red Rock!

Day 4: Chapel Theme - God Goes with You

In this chapel I looked at the roller coaster of emotions the disciples must have felt when Jesus died, came back to life, and then left them again.  How would it feel to know that your best friend, the one you gave up your job, friends and family for, the one who changed the way you look at EVERYTHING was willingly leaving you.  Imagine the excitement of finding out he had come back from the dead only to realize he wasn't sticking around.  But Jesus, in his wisdom, left them with these final words, "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." Matthew 28:20  Every single one of us has felt rejection, abandonment, fear.  We have all experienced what the disciples felt in some way or another.  And the truth is, God goes with you!  He is the only one who will never leave you or forsake you!

Day 5: Chapel Theme - Go by Faith

This was basically another version of my "Dream Big" talk.  I told campers that I really hate my alarm clock and often hit the snooze button multiple times per morning.  What would it look like to live a life you were so excited about that you never wanted to hit the snooze button?  What if you were so expectant of how God would use you and teach you each day that when the alarm went off you would bolt out of bed.  When our lives are only filled with boredom and distraction, we are not living the life God has for us.  He wants us to live a life that requires faith!  Is there anything in our lives that actually requires us to 100% believe and trust God?  Are we taking risks and stepping out of comfort?  Are we going beyond the walls of our home, church, school, etc?  God is "able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." Ephesians 3:20.  Are we willing to step out and see how he wants to use us?

Overall, I had an amazing week at Red Rock.  Several campers made decisions to follow Christ and many more rededicated their lives.  One camper excitedly approached me and told me that she wanted to share her faith with a friend and realized that reading the bible for herself was the best way to do it.  It was like it dawned on her for the first time that the bible was actually a tool she could use to help her in her everyday life!  What an amazing truth.

Hide it in your Heart

This morning I was challenged to memorize more scripture.  Several years ago I made a goal to memorize the entire book of James.  I got through the first chapter.  So now I'm renewing my commitment to do it and making a goal to have it done by the end of summer.

It may seem like just another thing to do on a list that already runs off the page, but its not.  It's the heart of everything else I want to do.  If I want to speak and write to change lives, the basis of that needs to be the word of God.  In fact, if any of us want to live our lives in a way that makes a deep impact and builds the kingdom of God, our strength and ability to do so comes from God's word.  We can't to anything apart from him.

John 15:7 "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be given you." 

I want his word to remain in me, to live in me and through me.  I want to speak the word of God and if necessary, use my own words to explain it.  I would love to stand up in front of a group of students and recite a book of the bible as my sermon.  Sounds like a crazy idea doesn't it.  But how powerful could that be?  Jesus was the ultimate teacher after all.

My challenge to you: Join me and commit to memorize a certain amount of scripture this summer.  Let's do it together!  Leave a comment with you commitment.  Maybe it's one chapters, maybe it's several verses.  Ask God what he would have you do and let me know!

Sometimes

Sometimes I still feel inadequate
Sometimes I'm not sure if I've done a good job
Sometimes I look at the people around me succeeding and want what they have
Sometimes I'm like the child who just wants to know they are loved

I'm so glad to serve a God who doesn't look down on me when I feel this way - a God who calls me, invites me to crawl onto his lap, holds me and whispers "I love you.  You are so precious to me".

Take time to be honest with God, bring him the mess and ask Him what he wants to do with it.  Ask him what he thinks of you.  Trust me, he has died to tell you.

iphone, ipad, ipod World.

We drove out of the parking lot and onto the street.  I grabbed my purse and opened the side pocket which always held my phone, but it wasn't there.
"Can I use your phone babe?" I reached for his Blackberry.
"Sure."
After finishing my call I commented on how nice the phone was compared to the cheap-o I have.
"Ya Blackberry's are nice, but not as nice as ipad's, I mean, ipods...u phones".  We both laughed as he struggled to remember the right name.
"iphones?"
"That's the one."

In that moment I was reminded again how selfish our society has become.  Everything, even the name of the most popular cell phones, computers and mp3 players, is all about "I" rather than "You".  They're not called "you phones" for a reason.

It struck me in a particular way this morning as I've been working through some challenges with close friends.  This past two months have been such a busy time for me, and as a result I have let down some important people in my life.  The problem is, I've been focused on "I" and not "You".  This is easy to do when our lives become busy, stressed, emotional, etc.  However, as I mentioned in the last two posts, stress is not from God and worry is actually a sin.  And the result of most sin is that it hurts not only the sinner, but the people around the sinner.  That is what I'm experiencing.
A few of my friends don't feel loved because I've been too busy to show them care.  That breaks my heart.
I don't want the relationships in my life to suffer because I'm not taking the time to give my burdens and worries to God.  When was Jesus ever stressed to the point that relationships weren't his priority?  Yes, he took time to rest, alone and away from the crowd, but he didn't focus on all of his own needs at the expense of the needs of his friends.

Philippians 2:3 "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

A Theory Put to Test

So you know yesterday's blog?  Well, I was just put to test on the very thing I wrote about and not too sure I passed with flying colours.

Last week we bought a house.  It's a little bigger than the one we have now and in a beautiful neighborhood.  It's close to the river and a great park - a lovely place to walk the dog and eventually raise a family.  The day we bought the house we also listed our current place and spent last week sweeping, mopping, vacuuming, painting and preparing for the Open House.  Over 50 groups came through our place during the weekend and we were expecting several bids because of this.  However, when it came time for the offers, it didn't exactly go the way we hoped...

"There's only one bid." Alex looked at me with his eyebrows raised, waiting for my reaction.

"Really?" I felt my heart sink.  "Only one?"

We both looked at our realtor hoping for a sign that he was pulling a fast one on us. 

"Yes, just one.  Let's have a look at it shall we?"  He opened the folded piece of paper and looked relieved.  "It's not a bad offer."  He slid the paper over and we looked at the numbers, doing quick math in our heads.

I felt the disappointment sink in a little deeper, like red wine soaking into a plush white carpet.  It wasn't a terrible offer - in fact it was over our list price.  However, it was lower than we were hoping or expecting.  As we discussed and debated what to do I held back the tears threatening to make an embarrassing appearance.  Such high hopes, and adjusting to the new information was proving to be difficult.  In the end we took the offer and signed our little house over. 

Later that evening Alex and I talked and he encouraged me that God was in control and would take care of all the details.  I knew he wanted me to say it too - to speak my faith into being.  But I just couldn't.  I didn't say anything negative - but I missed the opportunity to speak life into being.  As I said yesterday, I'm still learning.  This morning I had the strength to speak the truth, but I hope next time I'm able to speak it at my lowest point, knowing the faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we cannot see.

"I'm So Stressed Out"

I'll be the first to admit I've spoken these four deadly words on occasion (okay more than occasionally, but I'm working on it!).  Especially considering this was my first year as a full time teacher, you can bet I told people I was stressed, busy, tired or just surviving when they asked "How are you really doing?".  However, what if saying these four little words actually increases the stress in our lives?  Would we still say them?

 Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death". 

Spoken word is a powerful tool.  Just look at the story of creation.  How did God create?  He spoke the world into being! "And God said, 'let their be light', and there was light." (Gen 1:1)

Even Jesus is referred to as the WORD of God in the book of John: "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was with God in the beginning." (John 1:1)

All of these verses demonstrate the power of the spoken word.  If the power of life and death is in our words, then what are we speaking over our lives on a regular basis?

When someone asks you how you are, are you speaking life of death over yourself?  You may be thinking, "Well Heather, I'm just being HONEST with people!"  I hear you.  That's been my excuse for years too.  I want to be honest...but if I'm being honest, that means I should be speaking truth right?  And the truth isn't how I'm feeling now...the truth is who God says I am and the promises he has spoken over my life.  So maybe a more HONEST answer if you're feeling overwhelmed would be "I'm in need of some rest or peace."  Or maybe, "I'm depending on God for some strength, energy, motivation, inspiration".

The truth I want to be speaking over myself is that I am blessed and highly favored!  I am more than a conqueror!  If Christ is for me, who can be against me?  God's strength is being made perfect in my weakness!  Nothing is impossible with God!  It may sound cheesy or cliche as it comes out of your mouth but ITS SPEAKING LIFE rather than death over your circumstances!  If God spoke it into being and it was, and we carry the Spirit of God, then we too can speak life or death into being.  So the next time you say "I'm stressed" think about what you are speaking into being.

Ageless Worth

"How old are you?" she asked incredulously.  She leaned over the table towards me, searching for a single wrinkle or age spot that might give me away.
"Twenty six" I replied with a big smile - an attempt to hide my frustration.
"Well you look barely nineteen, and not old enough to be married!"
"Thanks!" I said brightly, "I'd rather look young than old!"

All weekend I had been questioned about my age and it was beginning to wear on me.  For some reason, it felt like when they said I looked young, they were actually saying, "You're too young to be a writer, too young to be married, too young to be a high school teacher.  You're not experienced, mature, prepared enough for all of that. How can you have anything to say?"  Of course no one actually said that, but it was how I was beginning to feel.

I stepped out into the sun and allowed the rays to permeate the tight skin of my face, hoping a wrinkle or sun spot might suddenly appear and validate me as a woman.  I wished I was 10 years older, a thought I can honestly say, I'd never had before.  I thought back to an earlier conversation...

..."maybe you could see an image consultant and she could do your makeup to make you look older."
"Older?" I thought. "Isn't the whole point of wearing makeup to make you look younger?!?"  I stared blankly at the women in front of me and felt the disappointment sink in.

Are we as women never good enough just the way we are?  Or will we always feel too old, too young, too fat, too skinny, too athletic, too weak, too naive, too experienced, too loud, too quiet?  Can't God use us right now, exactly the way he made us?

Guess what world, I'm not going to wait until I'm 35 to speak the truth of God's word!  I'm not going to depend on a head of grey hair to give me credibility as a writer.  I'm not going to start pursuing my dream after a mid-life crisis.  I'm going to do it now.  I will write and teach boldly as a 26 year old who looks like she's barely 18!  I will speak the truth to both women and men, both young and old whenever God gives me the opportunity.  I will not believe the lie from the enemy that I am somehow not good enough.

1 Timothy 4:12 "Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity."

Hearing God's Voice

Four years ago I read a book called "Can you Hear Me?" By Brad Jersak and it changed my life.  It changed the way I prayed.  It changed the way I "listened" for God's voice.  It changed my perspective about intimacy with Jesus. 

Last weekend I had the wonderful opportunity to hear Brad speak and it brought me back to the time in my life when I first started hearing God's voice on a regular basis.  In fact, during his talk, he had us do some listening prayer exercises and I was once again amazed by how quickly God responded - but then again why should I be surprised right?

John 10:27 says "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me."

We were asked to imagine ourselves in a "meeting place" with God.  Mine is in a jungle by a waterfall which falls from 70 feet down into a pool surrounded by smooth stones kinda like this: 

Where would your meeting place be?

The picture I saw last Friday evening was a bit different though.  Jesus was sitting up in a tree like this:

He had a huge smile on his face, like he was almost laughing.  I climbed up to join him and sat beside him on the branch.  I asked him why he was smiling and instinctively I knew it was because he was excited for my future.  He could see what was next and his smile assured me it was good. His eyes were serious and told me not to worry.  And as I rested my head on his shoulder I felt his love and opened my eyes to his perspective.

The reason this picture was so significant is because just the day before I had resigned from my full time, permanent teaching position.  Hearing and seeing this from God was exactly what I needed and brought me so much comfort. 

Psalm 86:17 "Give me a sign of your goodness, that my enemies may see it and be put to shame, for you, O LORD, have helped me and comforted me."

God wants to speak to us!  Why not take some time today and ask him where he would meet you, and what He would say to you?

 

Pure in Heart

Well, the Jonah post will have to wait...here is an article I wrote for the October issue of SUSIE magazine on emotional purity.  Leave your comments below!

The first time Claire fell in love she was seventeen years old.  She met Carter while counseling at bible camp and he was fun, adventurous and loved God.  Purity was important to her and she made a commitment to remain sexually pure in their relationship.  However during their three-year relationship, the idea of emotional purity never crossed her mind.  Maybe if it had, she wouldn’t have ended up with a broken heart.

When the word purity comes up it usually relates to the idea of physical or sexual purity.  Many teens commit to purity and demonstrate it by wearing a ring or a necklace.  The line, “true love waits” is well known among many Christian and non-Christian youth.  Even celebs like the Jonas Brothers, Miley Cyrus and Hillary Duff are showing off their purity rings! But what does it look like to be emotionally pure in a dating relationship?  Is it even important?  Is it something God cares about or mentions in His word?

Matthew 5:8 says, “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God”.  What does it mean to be “pure in heart”?  To understand this verse we need to clarify what the word “heart” means.  In the bible, the heart often represents three things: our mind, will and emotions.  This is where the idea of emotional purity comes from.  God has actually called us to be pure in our emotions and what better place to start than in our dating relationships?  What is more emotional than dating a guy? 

When Claire fell for Carter, she set out clear physical boundaries for their relationship, but she didn’t set out any emotional boundaries.  She wore her heart on her sleeve, sharing all of her deepest thoughts and feelings with him right away.  This is very easy to do when a relationship begins because everything is so new and exciting.  But if we want to remain “pure in heart”, we need to ask ourselves, “What is my motivation for sharing intimate thoughts and feelings with this person?”  If our motivation is to push the relationship forward before its ready, or to find acceptance and belonging in a guy’s affirmation, maybe pouring our hearts out isn’t the best idea.  In Claire’s situation, her motivation was rooted in insecurities about her value and identity that she wasn’t taking to God.  When Carter ended the relationship, her heart was completely crushed because she did not guard it along the way.

Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else guard your heart, for it is the well spring of life”.  God knows our hearts are fragile which is why He instructs us to guard them as well as keep them pure.  There are many ways to set up emotional purity boundaries in your dating relationship that could save you from a broken heart like Claire’s. Here are three of them:

1.      Patience: Don’t Go too Far, too Fast

Though the phrase “too far, too fast” usually refers to the physical aspect of a relationship, these words can be applied to the emotional aspect as well.  In fact, because every human is physical, emotional, mental and spiritual, it makes sense that all of these areas should be in balance with one another.  If we reveal too much of our hearts too soon, its likely that we’ll end up feeling tempted to move forward physically too soon.  So try to hold back – play a little hard to get.  As the girl, you have the luxury of sitting back and allowing the guy to work for your affection!  Most guys actually enjoy this challenge and when we put everything out there on the first date, we actually rob them of the experience of winning us over, or just scare them off.  Every relationship is different, but a good way to stay in check is to ask your self, “Why do I want to reveal more of my emotions to this guy?”  If your motivation comes from of a place of insecurity or impatience it’s probably a good idea to wait.  In the case of Carter and Claire, she rushed ahead because she was impatient and wanted to control the relationship rather than trust God with it.  There was even and small part of her that doubted he was really the guy God had for her, but she ignored that little voice and rushed ahead even faster because of it. 

2.      Growing Trust: Reveal More as You Trust More

Growing trust takes time and you can love someone without trusting them completely.  I’ll say that again: You can love someone without fully trusting them.  How is this possible?  The bible instructs us to love everyone but it doesn’t instruct us to trust everyone.  So as you grow in your dating relationship, just because you feel you love the person doesn’t mean you should trust them with your heart.  Trust takes time.  It’s built when your boyfriend tells you something about himself and then, over time, you actually observe that thing to be true in his life.   Like when He tells you he’ll always be there for you, ask him to go with you to visit your Grandma in the hospital and see if he actually comes.  When you see his character confirmed in the way he speaks and lives, trust begins to grow and as it grows more you can reveal more of your heart – your thoughts, feelings and dreams – knowing you are safe to do so.  Carter told Claire that he was trustworthy, but she didn’t wait for him to show it in his actions before giving her heart to him.  In the end, he wasn’t who he said he was and her heart was hurt because of it.

3.      Hidden in God: Pursuing God while being Pursued

“A woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her” ~Max Lucado.  This quote by Max Lucado points out the most important thing we can do to remain emotionally pure – hide our hearts in God.  But what does it mean to have a heart hidden in God?  It means that our first priority, our number one goal is to know God more.  It means we pour out our hopes, dreams, fears and doubts to Him first.  It means we turn to God for comfort, assurance, security and purpose before turning to another.  In doing this, we truly guard our hearts.  God loves you more than any man, even your future husband, will be able to.  He wants to speak words of affirmation, life and truth over you – words that will strengthen and protect your heart.  It says in Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever”.  God wants you to remain emotionally pure because He doesn’t want you to get hurt.  But sometimes we do fail in this area and our hearts are broken like Claire’s was.   Know that God can heal your broken heart and strengthen it once again if you bring it to Him.  
Two years after Claire’s relationship with Carter ended she met Jack.  Jack was a godly young man who pursued Claire and treated her like the princess she was.  But Claire didn’t rush ahead this time and because her heart was hidden in God, Jack had to pursue God in order to win her over.  And when He did, she knew that no matter how much she loved Jack, she would always to go to God first, to be the strength of her heart and her portion forever.

God on Facebook?

I've been reflecting on the world of facebook lately and I recently asked God what He thinks about it. It's strange to think of God having an opinion about the the internet, technology, social networking, etc. but when Jesus walked the earth, he always taught in culturally relevant ways, so why wouldn't He do the same today?
Here is what I believe He spoke to me about it: I Read Your Status Updates!  How cool is that!?! This has all kinds of implications and here are some of the ones I see:

1. Out of the overflow of the Heart, the profile is updated.  Have you ever noticed that some of our updates are often discouraging, negative and hopeless?  If you look back over your last 30 updates, what would it say about your character, your attitude, your relationship with God?  Lately I've been trying hard to only update my status with words that are positive, hopeful and most of all, TRUTHFUL!  I'm am certainly not someone who is naturally positive and I'm all for being genuine.  However, I'm also learning the power of speaking God's truth over my life and my circumstances, even when things are tough.  Updating my profile has become another way to practice speaking truth over my life.

2. God loves you a lot!  He cares about the little details of your life more than anyone else!  Isn't that why we're on facebook and why we update our status?  We want people to know us and to care about us!  We put it out there so people will understand, listen and maybe respond to our thoughts, feelings, musings, etc.  If we didn't care, we wouldn't do it. God reads your updates! He cares about the little details of your life and he wants to comment.  Are we updating him as much as we're updating the world?  And are we listening for His comments?  

Heather's vBlog #2

Every Last Bit

When I lived at home I loved teasing my mom about her music choices.  It's not that they were bad, but definitely not always my taste.  One of the artists she liked was by CeCe Winans, a gospel singer who wrote a song called "Alabaster Box".  I used to play that song and sing as dramatically as I could, into the handle of a broom as I cleaned the kitchen, or over the drone of the vacuum during Saturday morning chores.  Well a few days ago, the song came back to me (the power of music hey?) after 10 years and God spoke to me through it.

On Friday I had a really tough day at work and got home feeling pretty miserable.  And as I was trying to relax and unwind, these lyrics from CeCe Winans song came back to me:  

"And I've come to pour my praise on Him like oil from Mary's Alabaster Box
Don't be angry if I wash His feet with my tears and I dry them with my hair."

As I started to sing these words, God showed me a picture of a bottle with one inch of oil remaining in the bottom of it...sorta like this:

And he said to me, "Heather this is you.  I want you to pour out ALL your praise to me...don't hold anything back!"   
Immediately I felt defensive and thought, "That looks like a lot already! Is it so bad to just hold back a little, to keep myself safe and comfortable?!?"  
But He persisted and suddenly I was convicted of the fact that I have been holding back from God.  I've been giving Him almost all of my time, energy, attention and praise, but I've been holding back just enough to keep me from feeling empty.  And the area I've been holding back in is my worship.

And then He said, "When you keep that last little bit on reserve, you actually limit me from being able to fill you up in a new way...I can't put new wine in an old wine skin."   
It was then I realized this: If I insist on keeping a little bit held back, I actually keep myself from being filled to overflowing with new love, new energy, new creativity and new inspiration from God.

The best part of all of this was that God wasn't asking me to DO more for Him.  He's asking me to love Him more, praise Him more and spend more time with Him.  In some ways this is even harder than doing more, but it feels like a breakthrough for me.  I've been feeling so dry for so long and I think I'm realizing why...I've been keeping a little back to try and protect myself, and in the end I've limited the new things that God wants to show and give me.  

Today I want to come before Him and pour it all out, like the woman with the Alabaster Jar.  She spared no expense, but poured out all of that which was most valuable to her on the feet of Jesus, and I believe she was filled anew because of it.

"When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them...Jesus said 'Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.'" Luke 7: 37&44

Not for Sale

I just got home from YC Manitoba where I was hanging out with my dear friend Amanda Falk.  I  had the opportunity to listen to an amazing speaker named Preston Centuolo who spoke powerfully about the story of Joseph.  He talked about the four things that Joseph held onto and would not put "up for sale".
They were:
1. His Dreams 
2. His Sexuality 
3. His Perspective
4. His Forgiveness

Although I personally have struggled in all four of these areas, the one that hit home was #1 - His Dreams.  Joseph had a dream from God, and even when his own brothers, those closest to him, beat him down and threw him in a pit, he did not give up on the dream God had given him.
In 2002 I traveled to New Zealand to attend Capernwray Bible School.  When school finished I went to Australia for a few weeks.  One particular day I ended up in Byron Bay and a church called Surfside Christian Fellowship.  It was there that God first planted His dream for me in my heart...it was this: "Don't stop until you're speaking in front of thousands of people.  God has called you to be a speaker/preacher".  It was the first time I ever heard these words, but when I did, the just fit.  They made me feel whole.  I knew they were from God.
Since that time I have begun to see this dream come true.  I've had the opportunity to serve on the Beautiful Unique Girl tour and to speak at summer camps, retreats, conferences and church events.  I have traveled across Canada and Australia and spoken to many youth and young adults.  But there are days like today when I feel I'm still so far away and Satan, the King of Lies, tries to steal my dream.    There are days like today when I go to an event like YC Manitoba and begin to doubt that I will ever have the chance to speak at something like that.
Today I was there with my friend who has been involved in YC events for several years, but I was just there as "Amanda's friend".  Don't get me wrong, that's all I wanted to be there for, but some part of me longs for more.  I want to be there as "Heather Boersma - Youth Speaker".  I want to see my name in that program and know I have the opportunity to share God's truth with those who come.  I believe that's what I was made to do and yet there's is nothing I can do to make it happen.  I can prepare, and pray, and be patient, but in the end it will have to be God.  It's not about me...it's about Him. 
Amidst all of this emotion, I heard the truth spoken tonight.  And I'm laughing in the face of doubt and declaring truth over my life - My Dream is Not for Sale!

Black Pearls

I spent some time with the Lord this morning and asked Him for a picture.  It's been a very long time since I've taken the opportunity to sit in His presence, ask a question and actually wait for an answer.  At first I thought He was showing me a blueberry and I was thinking "Lord, really?  Does this have something to do with spiritual antioxidants?!?"  But as I waited I realized that it was a black pearl and the phrase "pearls of wisdom" came to mind.

As I thought about it some more I asked God "Why a black pearl and not a traditional cream-coloured one?  I sensed that the reason was because the pearl of wisdom He was going to give me would come in the form of a trial or something that may seem negative or difficult.

This makes a lot of sense with what I know about pearls and how they are formed.  A natural pearl forms when a foreign body such as a parasite or or other object lodges itself in the soft body of an oyster. The oyster attempts to protect itself by secreting pearl nacre, a smooth crystalline substance that surrounds and ultimately encases the object. As layer upon layer of nacre is added, the object becomes larger and a pearl is formed.

God wants to use the "irritants" in our lives to bring us pearls of wisdom.  At first it may seem that what we are going through is negative and not from God. But he uses these situations, relationships and challenges to refine us and make us wise.  Looking back on the last few weeks I can see a few difficult situations that really made me upset at the time.  However I realize now that through them, God was bringing my weaknesses to light to be refined.  I can either ignore it as a bad day, or embrace it and allow Him to make something beautiful in me.

When it Just Clicks - Spiritual Friendships

There are times in life when you meet someone and you just click with them.  It can even happen that you see someone new and know right away there is a connection.  I can't put it into words, but it has happened to me in the past and I believe it happens for a reason. One of the times this happened to me is when I met my dear friend Alisha.

I graduated from high school with an awesome group of friends and had a few close ones that really got me.  However I had only just scratched the surface of amazing friends God was going to bring into my life.  In January 2002 I traveled across the globe to New Zealand to attend Capernwray Bible School and my first day in New Zealand I met Alisha.  After over 30 hours of travel I arrived at a hostel and met three girls who were also going to Capernwray.  Alisha was one of them.  They were on their way out to the mall and invited me to come along.  I decided to go.  Somehow Alisha and I struck up a conversation and it has been going ever since.
What happened that day over 8 years ago was God brought me a spiritual sister - someone who spoke my language and was on my "wavelength".  Over McDonalds fries and burgers, in a food court in Auckland, NZ we forged a new friendship.  At first we thought each other was "alright" and didn't really understand the connection we had.  But a week or so later, we realized that we had just met our best friend.
I tell this story because I really believe that God wants to bless us with spiritual brothers and sisters (brothers for brothers, and sisters for sisters...), and sometimes He waits even until after high school to do it.  We need to be on the look out for these people.  They are people who we may not have everything in common with, but somehow they just click with us.  They are people who are interested not only in our lives as they are now, but in God's calling and destiny for our future as well.

Amanda, another spiritual sister of mine taught me that God brings people into our lives for "a reason, a season or a lifetime".  This is another lesson that I've learned over the years...not every good friend is going to be for "a lifetime" and that's okay.  Sometimes we'll be close to someone for just a season of life.  This often happened to me when I worked at summer camps.  One summer I was so close with a few girls and the next summer there were new people I became attached to.  And though I still love each one of them, few of them are my closest friends today.  It has brought me a lot of freedom to allow friendships to serve different purposes in my life and let go of them when that purpose has been accomplished.
Who are your spiritual brothers and sisters?

Who is in your life for a reason? a season? a lifetime?

Take some time today and tell those people how grateful your are for them.
If you feel you haven't met that friend yet, pray and ask God to bring that person along that you click with.  He wants to bless you in this way.

Proverbs 27:17 "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another."

Living and Believing based on Knowing, not Feeling

I went to church yesterday and literally felt nothing.  It was a beautiful Easter service and the congregation was rejoicing, smiling, crying and praising God with real and raw emotion.  I felt empty.  I reflected on this while driving home and began to feel really horrible about myself.  Why is it that I can hear the story of what Jesus did for me on the cross and still feel nothing?  Does it mean I'm a bad person? A weak Christian? Disconnected from God?

By the time I got home I came to this conclusion: I'm living my life and believing in Jesus based on knowing He is real, not always feeling He is real and I'm okay with this.  Maybe I don't cry everytime I hear about His death, but it doesn't mean I appreciate His sacrifice any less.  Maybe there are days, weeks, even years when I feel disconnected from God's presence, but this doesn't mean he's left me or changed his mind about it.  He loves me even when I don't feel Him.  And I really do love Him, especially for that!

Fan it into Flame

            I distinctly remember my mom’s voice echoing through the cabin walls, “Everyone get outside!”  Grabbing my book, I jumped off the top bunk and ran towards the sound of her panic.  Through the kitchen and out the back door, my heart knocked my ribs with fear and my nostrils filled with the smell of smoke.  In front of me raged a fire, climbing up and dancing across the skeletal pine trees surrounding the cabin.  I watched as my family frantically doused the blaze with buckets of water, trying to control it.   Even at ten years old I knew the fire was serious and could easily destroy our beloved cottage with its furious flames.

            Fire is one of the most powerful elements on the planet.  Just one small spark can set a forest to flames.  I believe this power is what Paul speaks of when he encourages his young friend Timothy to “fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you…” (2 Timothy 1:6).  What Paul is describing is not a small, controlled campfire flame, safe for roasting marshmallows over.  I believe he is describing a crazy-wild bonfire flame, burning with passion and purpose for God!

            But what is this gift we are to fan into flame?  Timothy, like each of us, was created in the image of God- a piece of God was placed inside of him.  One could even speculate that part of the “gift of God” Paul wanted Timothy to fan into flame was the gift of creativity.  Because God is creator of the universe and His image is inside of us, we all possess the gift of creativity in some form or another.  It is like a ‘spark’ placed inside of us at the moment of our conception.  The question is, how do we fan that spark into a flame and keep it burning brightly for God?  How do we ignite our creativity so that it turns into a wildfire for the world to see?

There are three things a fire needs to burn: heat, fuel and air.   Without heat a fire cannot begin, without fuel it cannot grow and without air it cannot be sustained.  In order for us to fan our creativity into flame we need three things as well: God’s image (the spark), God’s word (the fuel) and God’s Spirit (the air).

The Spark: God’s Image

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:27

We all have the spark of God’s image inside us.  God made humans in His image and He is by nature, creative.  He is the Creator!  Because of this, creativity is part of God’s image which is woven into the fabric of who we are.  Whether its painting, drawing, crafting, building, speaking or writing, the spark of creativity is not something we can attain by effort.  Rather it is something that has been given to us. However the spark of creativity cannot fan itself into flame.  We need something more if the spark is to grow and become a powerful and effective fire, burning for God.

The Fuel: God’s Word

“For the word of God is living and active...”Hebrews 4:12

If we are to see the spark of creativity come alive in us, we need to get to know our Creator, through His living word.  When I meet someone who possesses a quality I desire, I want to spend time with that person.  I want to know them more so I can understand that quality, and perhaps learn how to emulate it.  The same is true with God.  He possesses all the creativity we could ever want and if we want to be more creative, we need to know Him more.  What better way to do that than to study His word?  The bible is full of stories and truths that help us know and understand God better.  If we take time to read, meditate upon, and live out God’s living word, the spark of creativity will grow in our lives.  God also speaks directly to us, inspiring us with creative ideas and ways to turn those ideas into a reality.  Who better to give you and idea for a business or a piece of art than the Creator of the universe and the one who sees both present and future?

The Air: God’s Spirit

“Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty.” Zechariah 4:6

All of our creativity is a waste without God’s Spirit breathing life into our creations.  When I write, I don’t want to write with human words and express human ideas.  I want my work to be filled with the power of the Spirit so that it will actually have an eternal impact on those who read it.  We were created to help bring God’s kingdom on earth, as it is in heaven.  However, this is impossible without the work of the Holy Spirit in and through us.  It is not our brilliant creativity that will change lives, but the power of the Holy Spirit.  Maybe you have an amazing idea for a book or a great business plan, but if the Holy Spirit isn’t sustaining your plans, what lasting impact can it have?

Do you want to use your creativity as a powerful force for the kingdom of God?  Do you want to see that spark turn into a fire burning brightly and wildly for Him?  Then recognize the spark He’s placed in you and fan it into flame with the fuel of His word and the air of His Spirit.

Learning to say "No"

The first word many children learn to say is "no".  When a parent hears this word I imagine they feel somewhat discouraged or disappointed.  It could have been "dada", "mama" or even "yes".  But "no" is actually a very important word.  Perhaps the first word children learn, is the first word many adults forget.

Why do we feel the pressure, even from infancy, to always say "yes"?  Why are we taught that saying "no" is bad and saying "yes" is good?  Why does the church - the body of Christ - push us to be "Yes-Men/Women"?  Is this really all that God wants from us?

I realize this is difficult topic because it addresses the difference between "obedience and sacrifice", two very similar ideas.  Before I go any further, let's start at our foundation - the word of God.
I Samuel 15:22 "But Samuel replied: Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams."  (emphasis mine)

Here is a thought: The right action, at the wrong time and for the wrong reason, is the wrong action.  That is the difference between obedience and sacrifice.  In the story from which this verse was taken, Saul - King of Israel - told Samuel the reason he and his men kept some of the plunder from battle, was to give to God as a burnt offering.  That in and of itself, was a good thing.  However, in doing this, Saul disobeyed God's first command, which was to destroy everyone and everything.  How does this relate?

Saul said "yes" (to keeping sheep and livestock for an offering to God) when he should have said "no".   Even though giving a burnt offering was a "good thing", the reason he did it was wrong.  His motivation was selfish and his heart was rebellious to the Lord.  In fact, right before this conversation with Samuel, Saul had just finished building a monument to honor himself, instead of God!

How often do we do the right thing for the wrong reason?  Do you ever say yes to impress others and honor yourself, instead of God?  There is a difference between obedience (saying yes to God's voice and commands) and sacrifice (saying yes to what you/others deem to be "right" or "good" things).  Sometimes it is better to say no.


I believe learning to say no is a skill that God values.  There was a time in my life when I didn't know how to say no.  Every time I was asked to be involved, help out or volunteer I said yes.  I felt I was a good person and a good Christian because of this.  Until I realized that in saying yes to doing all this stuff, I had actually said no to being with God.

Is your "yes" to good deeds, inadvertently saying "no" to intimacy with God?

Free

I remember it like a photograph. I was about 15 or 16 years old, sitting in the balcony at church during a Sunday morning service. I was enjoying a moment of worship with the Lord when suddenly I had what I believe was a divine revelation. And it was this: "It really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of me! In Gods' presence I am completely free to be myself."

This was something I had heard said before, but in that moment I truly understood it and the freedom I felt was like nothing else. I was surrounded by people, some friends and some strangers, and I felt for the first time that it really didn't matter what their opinions about me were. It didn't matter if they thought it was strange that I raised my hands in worship, or didn't like my voice, or if they thought I was uncool or ugly. It didn't matter because God was the one I was designed to please.

Galatians 1:10 says, "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ."

This verse doesn't just demonstrate that we as believers should focus on pleasing God rather than man. It also says that if we are trying to impress others we are not a servant of Christ! Wow. This is not just an instruction for us, but also an encouragement. If you say that you are a servant of Christ, then you are no longer bound to the approval of other people - you are free!

You are free to be yourself, with all your strengths, weaknesses, quirks and habits. You are free to snort when you laugh, where sweats to the grocery store and tell cheesy jokes. You're free to raise your hands in worship or fall to your knees in humility before the Lord. You are free to share your faith with others and not worry if they will believe, or even if they'll think you're insane. You are free! But the catch is this, when you slip back into pleasing man, it means you aren't serving Christ! It is actually an act of disobedience. So being yourself is not simply an encouragement and calling, but a command.

More Thoughts on Holding Back...

So I wonder what the bible says about this topic other than "guard your heart"? In terms of church and getting involved I think it is clear that we as believers are members of the "body of Christ". It is also clear that if one part suffers, the whole body suffers with it. If I'm holding back, as apart of the body, it will indeed affect the rest of the body. Its as though one part - my part- has been injured.

Back in September I threw my back out for the first time ever. It was a sign that I am indeed getting older and can't bounce back quite a quickly as when I was 16. Because of that one part of my body being strained, the rest of my physical being suffered. I was unable to sit, walk or run comfortably and was in so much pain I found it hard to concentrate on anything else. Only through rest, massage and chiropractic work was I brought back to full health. Had the injury not healed, I would still be affected today.

When I was in Australia working at the church, I was injured immensely. And now my injury, if not healed by God, could be a detriment to the rest of the body of Christ. Wow! The last thing I want is for the enemy to steal anymore from me, or any other believer because of the painful experience I had there. I don't want the hurt caused by those relationships to continue to hinder myself and others. And yet if I don't let go, forgive, and move on whole-heartedly, this is exactly what will happen. My injury will drag down the body I am apart of.

And so the answer is clear; "If one part suffers, every part suffers with it..." (1 Corin. 12:26) My holding back will affect more than just me.

What Holds Us Back?

Sometimes I have trouble fully committing. In many areas of life I have a tendency to hold back, at least a little. I hold back some of my effort, thought, care, or heart. I hold back in terms of committing time or sometimes emotion. Don't get me wrong, I think it is important to have boundaries, but I can also see the danger in not fully embracing life - giving life a "side hug" because its safer and more comfortable. I know the bible calls us to "guard our heart" but are there times when God asks us to lay it all out there and hold nothing back?

One example of this for me is getting involved at church. I've experienced all levels of involvement at various churches. I've been through all the extremes, from being a passive Sunday morning observer, to an active plan, speak, sing and serve every Sunday morning and 3 or 4 nights of the week attender. In fact last year at this time I was volunteering at a church in Australia and was so involved that I actually lived in the church building. There wasn't a prayer meeting that went on without my attendance for 6 months. I was preaching every few weeks, in the worship band, planning outreach events, attending bible study and even baking and cleaning. And in the end of that experience I got burned - burned so bad I didn't think I'd ever recover.

Since being back Alex and I have found a new church to call home, a place where we see God's love in action and feel drawn to be apart of it. And though this place is loving, accepting, real and honest - I'm scared to death of committing. So I go on Sunday mornings, and I sporadically attend a house group and connections class, but there is something in me that holds back. Something that causes me to say, "I just don't feel like going". Something that keeps me from wanting to use my gifts. Something that makes me sit back passively and not really get involved.

And that's where I'm at. I can't end this post with a verse or a hopeful thought because I don't have the answers. I just know that I'm holding back and that its leaving me unsatisfied.

DREAMING BIG

Well lately I've been writing more than I have since I was in University. And I'm really enjoying it. If fact I have an article that will be published in "Susie" magazine this summer so that's pretty cool (www.susiemagazine.com). This will be my first publication and I'm really looking forward to getting more of my writing out there. I've loved writing ever since I was in Jr. High. I remember starting to write my first devotional book when I was in grade 8. I never did finish it, but I've started working on another one, and it'll happen eventually.

Presently I'm working on an article called "Dream Big", the same title as this blog. It's sort of a life slogan/message I feel God has given me to carry. The idea that there is so much more to life that all we could ask, dream or imagine when we're following God. So I thought I'd include the article here. It's still a draft, but here goes.

Dream Big

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…” Ephesians 3:20 (NIV)

“Dream Big!” These two words make my heart race because I believe they have the potential to change your life. God spoke these words to me several years ago and I haven’t stopped thinking about them since. They are words full of potential, excitement and hope. They are powerful words. In fact, every once in a while I see these words splashed across university promo posters or magazine ads for department stores. In fact the other day while shopping at Costco, I was shocked to see a book by Oprah entitled “Dream Big”. Not only was I shocked, but also disappointed because I believe these words deserve so much more. When the world says “Dream Big” it means dream about the big house you could have, or the beautiful things you could fill it with. Or maybe, dream about being on the Oprah show one day, because then you’ll really have arrived. But the idea of “Dreaming Big” wasn’t thought up by humans who are trying to inspire and motivate other humans. This idea represents a promise God gave us through his word, over 2000 years ago.

Ephesians 3:20 says that God is able to do “immeasurably more” than all we can ask or imagine! We serve a God who enables us not only to dream big, but to actually see the fulfillment of big dreams in our lives! But how? I wish I could give you a ten-step program of how to make all your dreams come true, but I can’t. I can only repeat the steps God outlines for us in the bible, because His words are trustworthy and true. Here are a few of His truths that can guide us as we work towards our big dreams.

Step 1: Allow God to plant HIS dreams in you.

Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” The first step to seeing your dreams come true is asking God to give you HIS dreams for you. I used to think this verse meant that if I spent enough time reading my bible and praying (delighting in the Lord) He would return the favor by giving me everything I wanted. I’ve since discovered that when we delight in God, he actually plants HIS dreams for the world, in us. Take some time to ask God what His dreams for you are. And believe me His ideas will be way better than the ones you could’ve thought up on your own!

Step 2: Be faithful in the little things.

Matthew 25:23: "His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things.” Once God has planted His dreams in us, we often have to wait to see them fulfilled. However, this doesn’t mean we sit around watching TV, checking our Facebook pages and waiting for our Big Dream to come knocking. It means we look at our present circumstances - the “little things” God has put in front of us- and treat them as though they are our big dreams. Your school, friends, family and job are all things God asks you to be faithful with. Treat these things with as much importance and value as if they were your ultimate goals and God promises He will “put you in charge of many things”.

Step 3: Go after intimacy with God.

Matthew 22:37: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." In the end, nothing else matters besides knowing God. How well do you know Him? Do you realize His heart longs for you? Do you know He is jealous for you? Do you know He wants to speak to you? And most importantly, if you met him today, would you recognize Him? The greatest fulfillment we will ever experience, now or in eternity, comes by loving and being loved by God. There is no greater satisfaction than what we will feel when we see the unveiled face of our Creator, Father and Savior Jesus Christ. I think these lines from Hillsongs United say it well: "Though I have not seen him, my heart knows him well". Does your heart know him well? Take some time today to hang out with God. Tell him that you love Him and allow him to love you back.

Chasing after our dreams is part of the adventure of this life. However we are called to worship the dream-giver, not the dream. Let's not forget that as we pursue the abundant life God has promised us.

Blue Bird Day

The sun glares off the windshield as it rises above the zigzag line of the Rockies on the horizon. My feet rest on the dash and Alex looks over giving me a look that says, “Do you really have to put your bare feet on the dash?” I smile back, close my eyes and tap my toes to the beat of the music coming from the radio. It’s 6:30 am on a February morning and we are off to SunshineVillage for a day of skiing (for me) and boarding (for Alex). It doesn’t get any better than this.
After a two and half hour drive through Calgary, Canmore and Banff we finally arrive at the hill. Alex goes to buy the lift passes and I head up to the rental shop to get some skies. You see I’m the prairie-girl-who-doesn’t-own-skies and Alex is the Alberta-born mountain junkie who has three snowboards and all the latest gear. But we both love the mountains, the snow and the thrill of the two combined.
On the scenic ride up the gondola we meet a family from Europe and converse easily, before stepping out into a sanctuary at the top. We are surrounded by tall, lanky evergreens growing on the steep sides of towering mountains.
“Which chair babe?” I ask.
“Angel” he says with a wink, strapping his board on and sliding over to the lift.
As we cruise up the mountain we excitedly plan our route and talk about the amazing conditions. It’s rarely sunny at Sunshine, but God seems to have smiled on us this “blue bird” day. The overnight snowfall glistens in the morning sun – fresh and inviting.
The first two hours are the best as we make fresh tracks through deep powder. Alex straight-lines down the hill and I keep up, cruising through the trees and keeping him in sight. By noon we are ready for a break and have lunch in the lodge. We feast on big burgers and crispy fries, smiles stretched across our wind-kissed faces. There is an ease and comfort in our conversation as we get bundled up and head back out.
Three more hours of playing and we are ready to head home. Its memorable days like this when I know we’re blessed to have one another.